


Jay Fucks His Camera

by OhNoNotAnotherFakeGeekGirl



Category: Marble Hornets
Genre: Other, pure unadulterated crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-12
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-10-03 04:57:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10236386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhNoNotAnotherFakeGeekGirl/pseuds/OhNoNotAnotherFakeGeekGirl
Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin. Pure crack that I wrote because, to my knowledge, this underrated OTP hasn’t been inflicted on the fandom yet. schrodingers-rufus, this one’s for you. Welcome home, pal.





	

A stuffy, claustrophobic silence descended over the motel room after Tim left to go buy food at the nearby gas station. Jay slouched at the motel room’s battered desk, lazily flicking through the day’s footage on his laptop. Perched nearby on its tripod was Jay’s camera, positioned in such a way that it appeared to be flirtatiously looking at him out the corner of its lens.

Jay caught the camera’s eye, and the corner of his mouth crept upwards.

“Just you and me, huh?” He said.

The camera’s power light intensified into a warm, LED blush. “Seems to be,” the camera timidly replied. If Jay’s camera had a mouth on it it’d probably be bashfully smiling at the man who’d held it close for all these years. A prickling warmth stirred through them both as they looked at each other.

“Y’know…” Jay said, breaking the silence, “I never really got a chance to… tell you, how thankful I am for your help through the past few years.”

Camera pointed its lens into an appreciative, humble downwards angle. “Oh Jay~” it sighed breathily.

“I mean it,” he said, “you and I have been through a lot together. Without you, I’m useless. You’re my other half.”

“Jay!” The camera gasped. “Y-you have no idea how happy it makes me feel to hear you say that!”

Jay grinned. “Do you want me to make you _even happier_?” he asked, voice dropping a quarter-octave lower than usual, which, all things considered, wasn’t all that low, not to mention the squeaky uptick in the second “e” of “even”.

Camera didn’t care, and giggled, feelings bubbling over into excited chirruping as Jay cradled the tripod and kissed it on the smooth, matte plastic encasing its electronics. The world melted away under the kiss until there was nothing but the Camera and Jay. Jay picked up Camera and gently lay it down on the bed in a bridal carry. He removed his clothes and knelt down over Camera, eyes fixed intently on the sleek, grey love of his life.

Camera looked down, gasping and blushing at Jay’s arousal.   

“P-please, Jay!” The camera cried in ecstasy, “Take me now!”

Jay traced his finger around the camera’s charging port, until suddenly his gaze drifted off, lost in thought.

“J-Jay?” Camera asked. “Is everything alright?”

“N-no, it’s fine…” Jay stuttered, looking into Camera’s bright, black lens. “Just…”

“Yes..?” Camera breathily, earnestly replied.

“…Where do I put it?”

Suddenly, the door opened. Silence slammed down upon the room like a tonne of video tapes. Standing paralysed in the doorway was Tim, a thin, grey grocery bag full of snacks for the next day’s road trip in one hand, and the motel room keys in the other. His eyes were wide open in shock, trying to process the sight of Jay, a friend he neither asked for nor particularly liked, _in flagrante delicto_ with his own _camera_ , of all things.

Jay was now very aware that certain erect _parts_ of his body were exposed. His gaze was in a deadlock with Tim’s, and as the seconds stretched on until they felt like hours, the cold air circulating around them only made that fact more apparent.

Finally breaking the deadlock, Tim cleared his throat and sharply sat the grocery bag on the nearest available surface- a disappointing-looking grey armchair.  
“Okay, Y’know what?” he said, throwing his hands up in defeat, “I’m just gonna head back out, smoke a cigarette or five, and pretend this never happened.”

Without a word, Tim closed the door behind him, and did just that.

Jay breathed a sigh of relief that _he_ didn’t have to be the one to defuse the situation, and gingerly looked around for his underwear.

**Author's Note:**

> You're all fucking welcome.


End file.
